Call Us: 423 661-4734 | Email: requests@comeandreason.com      
Selflessness and Bible Psychology

Selflessness and Bible Psychology

Regarding your belief that God is love and love is selfless and that the core of Christianity is that human hearts are selfish instead of selfless and other-centred how do you reconcile that with the belief that some women/mothers are selfless and self-sacrifing?

What would your opinion be of this quote by  Luciano L’Abate, Charles H. Bryson

“Selfless mothers produce selfish men (sons) who will grow up to be to opposite of them and like their fathers, and selfless women(daughters) who learn to be very much like their mothers.”

Personally i think the above quote is just an unproven theory & generalisation but isn’t it true that selflessness can sometimes be detrimental? For example, the picture of the selfless, rundown mother who always gives to her children & husband but never for herself. Couldn’t a selfless and other centred heart sometimes be detrimental to a person?

Also how do you reconcile your psychiatric beliefs with the beliefs of Martin & Deidre Bobgan that all psychiatry and psychology is heretical and not biblical,that Christ’s death was sufficient and that psychology prevents sanctification and is man made wisdom and not Godly?

M


Can you please talk about the principle of turning the other cheek as found in Luke 6:29:

If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic.

Twice, people have used that principle to say Christians shouldn’t defend themselves when verbally or otherwise attacked. 

C


Thanks for great questions.

The key to understanding this issue is a proper definition of love and selflessness. Love, is other-centered regard, being more concerned for the good, health, welfare of the other party than for oneself. Notice, love is concerned for the good, health, welfare of the other party – not what the other party believes is good for them, but what actually is good for them.

I was in the mall one day just watching the people. As I looked out from the second floor balcony I watched as a mother and her young son (approximately 5 years old) came to a fork in the walkway. The mother wanted to go to the right, but the son wanted to go straight. The son let go his mother’s hand and went forward about six paces. The mother stood there indicating they needed to go to the right. The son looked back at his mother and pointed at her demanding she come his way. He did this twice and the mother just stood there. Finally, the child angrily ran back to his mother punched her in the belly, kicked her in the shin and pointed to the ground for her to follow him – and she did.

Was this mother “loving” her child? Was she acting in “other-centered” regard? Was she doing what was in the best interest of her child? Of course not. This type of behavior is not love, it is not selflessness, it is not other-centered regard or compassion. It is selfishness arising from severe fear and insecurity, a dependent need on the part of the mother to do whatever it takes to keep the child happy with her. Such behaviors are gross counterfeits to genuine love, which does what is right, reasonable and healthy because it is right reasonable and healthy, not because others, even our children, agree.

Luke 6:29 is not a rule which is to be applied to all circumstances for Christ did not mean that parents should fail to discipline and instead allow their children to hit and abuse the them. Such distortion of Christ’s instructions occurs when we fail to understand what genuine love actually is. When we understand love promotes the long term health, wellness and eternal salvation of the other party then we are able to understand how to apply Christ’s instruction to turn the other cheek.

The idea that all psychiatry and psychology is opposed to God and God’s principles for healing come from failure to understand God’s creation, the problem sin caused and God’s solution for it. It is true that there are humanistic psychological models out there that oppose Godly principles, just as there are humanistic religions that oppose Godly principles. But, just because some religions oppose Godly principles doesn’t mean there isn’t a true religion centered in God’s character of love. Likewise, just because there are many godless philosophies within psychiatry and psychology, doesn’t mean there isn’t a healthy model of psychology which is built on God’s original design protocols.

In fact, the Bible says:

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. 4 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. 5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2Cor 10:3-5

When we fight a war over arguments, knowledge, pretensions and thoughts where is the battle ground? Where is such a war fought? In the mind! Genuine spiritual warfare is a battle for the minds of God’s children. As Christians we are to be renewed in our minds, have the mind of Christ, have the law of God written on the heart and mind. Therefore, as a psychiatrist who understands God’s creation, the laws upon which He designed the universe to run, and His methods for reversing sin’s damaging effect upon mankind, I find myself on the frontline in the war between Christ and Satan. Therefore, I daily seek God’s wisdom to accurately diagnose and bring to bear interventions that will reverse the damage caused by violations of God’s methods, principles and design template for life and help restore my patient’s back to God’s original design.

In my book Could It Be This Simple? A Biblical Model for Healing the Mind, I document a psychology that is wholly built on Godly principles and leads to genuine healing of mind. If you haven’t read it consider checking it out and decide if this model is a psychology that is in harmony with God’s word.

Email me the blog whenever a new one is published.

Donate online, securely via PayPal using your credit or debit card (no PayPal account needed, unless you want to set up a monthly, recurring payment).


cancel recurring payment

 

Want to use zelle instead?
See how on our
Support and Donations page.

Upcoming Events

calendar

Testimonial Post Slider

Testimony 59

I’m a native Ghanan, but am currently in France for my master’s degree. Prior to this, during my final years at undergraduate studies in Ghana, I was introduced to your ministry and I’ve been immensely blessed by what you share, especially about the Design and Imposed Laws. God richly bless you for that.

One of the first things I did when I arrived in France was to buy all four of your books. They not only helped me, but those I shared them with. I shared the message with an atheist student and I marveled at how God worked mightily in his life. Today this person shares the Love of God with others and debunks theories of who God is not. I want to share what you present in your “Heavenly Sanctuary and Investigative Judgment” pamphlet, because the message brought rest to my soul and I live today as a healthy person.

God bless you so much and your ministry.

Michael A., Ghana

 

Testimony 52

Your unique way in spreading the truth is what we all need today. Most of us don’t recognize the contamination coming from all the lies and selfishness in the world. Because of our fear of death, we forgot how to live. Lies left and right. I was losing hope and faith, because of so many ideas that are always contradicting each other – so many questions answered by other, more complicated, questions – until I found your channel on YouTube.

You did not just give me answers, you also taught me how to answer new questions that arise in my mind. Now I see things differently. I see God’s mercy, grace, and Love everywhere, in spite of all the chaos that we all have done as humans. I don’t fear death anymore. Accepting the Truth and Love about God is truly a genuine Freedom from all the confusions, sufferings, selfishness, pain, and death.

I just wanted to say, thank you, sooooo much for revealing the real Remedy for our infected life. I have a new hope and now see the world in a different perspective!

Wheinny P., University Place, WA, USA

 

Testimony 5

We listen to your bible studies lessons in our class in Montana. You actually were the main reason I decided to get a laptop, so I can go to your site and listen, read, learn, and print the class notes. I am so grateful to learn the correct view of God and his character. Now, to just have others have an interest in knowing, so I can share it with them. Good thoughts your way.

R. N., MT, USA

 

Testimony 65

I have been tuning into your weekly study classes for a while now and wanted express my appreciation for the teachings that ha been a huge blessing in opening up the true message of the word. Viewing scripture under an imposed law theory always, without fail, raised more questions, concerns, and conflicting scripture interpretations that were discouraging at the very least. Looking at scripture through the design law lens has brought more truth to light for me personally and an understanding of our Heavenly Father that places Him “above all others,” where I am now more than thrilled to witness and serve Him.  I “stumbled” across this ministry a year or so ago and would only watch a few minutes at a time. But the more I listened and the longer I paid attention, the more my spiritual eyes were opened to the ever present truths of scripture. The comprehension of the great controversy and it’s origin by the lies perpetrated and perpetuated throughout the Bible on the attack of God’s character and government is truly priceless. Keep up the Good Work! Your servanthood is desperately needed in such a time as this!

Jeff D., Reading, MA, USA

 

Testimony 3

My husband is a pastor and I listen to your lesson almost every week. Thank you for helping me in my study life and to help me love the “real” God more.

C. F., NC, USA

 

Testimony 28

I have been following your Bible study class for about a year now. I must say I am impressed with how your ministry has grown. I took it upon myself to listen to all your lesson podcasts from the past and they have both enriched me physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I have learnt a lot from this class. I have also noticed how the class has grown in spiritual strength. One of the things that benefited me is that now I am not afraid of God. I use to be, but now it has melted away. The second thing is that you helped me to have a real life relationship with God. Now He is my friend that was always there and I love having him with me all the time. Thirdly, because of this class, it inspired me to take over and lead a class. I have called it “Let Us Reason Together,” adapting your inquisitive style and creating a class of free thinkers.

T. Banda, Malawi, Africa

 

Testimony 53

I was so blessed by a friend who gave me your book, “The God Shaped Brain,” while I was sitting in church asking God to please help me learn more about Him and help me not to be so confused and scared. That was about 2 years ago. Your books have helped me to love God even more. I’m not confused or scared anymore! I have listened to all of your bible study classes and feel like I know the wonderful people that attend every week. Thank you for all that you’re doing in spreading the true message about God and His law of love. God bless you and your whole class.

Elssy P., Modesto, CA, USA

 

Testimony 32

The message [of Come And Reason Ministries is] for all Christians (and those who may become Christians) and not just Adventists or any other group. It is difficult to imagine why any [anyone] with intellectual and spiritual honesty could find fault with the way you explained the healing substitution concepts and the truth about God’s character, though I know some will reject and criticize. On behalf of those in our group near Tacoma, WA, thank you and your staff for all of the hard work and for sharing the Gospel in this manner. God’s message of healing love will be carried to the whole world and then Jesus will come – He promised it.

Terry U., Tacoma, WA, USA

 

Testimony 25

I just want to say thank you so much for your conversations via YouTube. I regularly tune in to your lectures, “Let’s Talk” sessions, and many others. Through these I’ve found greater depth and meaning to God’s word. Thanks for all that you do and please continue. I’m currently working in the middle of Silicon Valley at Stanford University. I feel like God really has me in the right place right now and I’m sensing that your teachings might be part of it.

B. F., Silicon Valley, CA, USA

 

Testimony 17

The blessings of clarity and understanding you and your class inspire me to take from the word of God have impressed upon me so greatly the true, loving character of our Creator. I have found amazing freedom and joy through building a stronger, more intentional relationship with Him. What is new is that this is now a relationship built on love, reverence and respect rather than fear and obligation, and as such my eyes have been slammed OPEN as I am continually impressed by the manifestations of God’s true character in His provisions for fallen man.

T.E.H., Salt Lake City, UT, USA

 

Testimony 70

I have been watching you for many years and have learned to love God with all my heart. I was raised by a loving Christian mother that had been lied to about who God really was, so our religious upbringing was hell fire and damnation. As soon as I was old enough and moved out, I not only left the church, I ran as fast as I could to get away from it. Sad to say, it wasn’t until the past couple of years that I learned and understand who my Father really is and how much He loves me. I understand God’s Design Laws (which make sense) and when I’m teaching my church Bible study class, I’m able to really put to use the things I’ve been learning and Holy Spirit is leading. Thank you for introducing me to my Father of true, pure love. Everyday with Him is new and exciting. One thing that breaks my heart is that I didn’t know Him sooner. God Bless you and your ministry!

Judy Phelps, Reno, NV, USA

Testimony 20

I just wanted to personally thank you for your teachings and insight into scripture. I came across your website via my cousin who suggested I look into “Healing the Mind” information. My youngest daughter has been struggling over the last couple of years and it all came to a head this spring. When I started listening to the “Healing the Mind” lectures my own life began to be transformed. I began sharing with all my daughters the concepts you laid out so clearly. I ordered your book and soaked it up. I just want to say “Thank You!” My walk with the Lord has been refreshed and renewed. Your obedience to the Lord is a blessing to so many.

R. K., Anderson, SC, USA

 

Testimony 66

I am incredibly grateful for the transformative impact you’ve had on my life, and words cannot fully express my appreciation. Over the years, I have been an avid listener and follower of C&R and extend my heartfelt thanks for creating the C&R mobile app. It has allowed me to immerse myself in your lessons repeatedly, enabling me to grasp the profound significance about the Character of God, Design Law, the protocols for life, the reasons behind the current chaos, and Christ’s mission to restore everything. They have deeply touched me. Having studied with various churches, I came away with the perception that God is no different from the deities of ancient Greek or Roman mythology—demanding sacrifices and taking pleasure in bloodshed. Thanks to your transformative teachings, I have experienced a profound awakening to the true nature of God and the immense power of His love. It is truly a remarkable and liberating sensation to finally grasp the truth and embrace the empowering nature of God’s laws. My self-perception has become brighter and more infused with love. My journey of growth continues on a daily basis.

Chris P., Lake Mary, FL, USA

 

Testimony 21

I am absolutly on fire with the message at Come and Reason! I can’t get enough! I’ve read your book, blog, and articles. I’ve listened to your Bible study podcasts, your radio show, and your series – all excellent! It wasn’t until the past couple of years that I have I like I’m becoming “healthy,” with more to share with others than just beasts and commandments! I used to be a Bible worker and preached when the pastors were gone until I had had enough. I didnt realize at the time what the problem was, but i know now… the message wasn’t properly focused. Now my flame is rekindled. All of your little examples are so perfect in explaining something “complicated” and making it easily understood! Now I’m trying to shape it into a life changing evangelistic series! Thank you!

M.T., USA

 

Testimony 2

I continue to enjoy your lessons every week. The more that I research your conclusions, the more I am convinced that the Holy Spirit has lead you to distill out the essence of human redemption. Thank you for your courageous stand for the truth.

S. G., TX, USA