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Любов и граници

Любов и граници

“Бях благословен от вашия семинар на тема „Изцеление на ума”. Предефинирането на определението за безусловна любов в светлината на закона за свободата поражда въпроси в съзнанието ми за това каква е нашата отговорност един към друг.

Каква е разликата в това да обичаме, както Бог го прави (непрекъснато отдаване, до степен да ни позволи да изберем да Го убием) и да имаме лоши граници в дисфункционални отношения, които дават възможност за деструктивно поведение?”

Д.Т.

Въпросът, който повдигате, е въпрос, с който много хора се борят. Ето защо ви благодаря, че го отправяте!

Богоподобната любов е принципът на благодеянието, ориентираността към другите, даването, саможертвата за доброто на ближния. Това означава просто, че като произтичащо от близката ни връзка с Бога, ние имаме в сърцето си най-добрия интерес на другия човек; и именно този мотив насочва нашите действия. Искаме да направим това, което ще бъде от най-голяма полза за него, от гледна точка на неговия най-добър вечен, а не само временен интерес. Това означава, че не просто даваме това, което иска другият човек, а даваме онова, което всъщност е най-доброто за него.

Какъв е “любящият” отговор от родител, чието дете иска да гледа телевизия, вместо да напише домашната си работа? Ако мислим кое е най-доброто за детето, отговорът е “не”. И това не е фокусирано само върху временните ползи от постигането на добри оценки в училище, а върху развитието на характера, помагайки на детето да развие правилно самоуправление, самодисциплина и способността да жертва непосредственото удоволствие за дългосрочното добро. Подобно решение е мотивирано в интерес на неговото вечно благополучие и е истински любящо.

Ако обаче мислим за себе си, ако се страхуваме от това как детето може да реагира, ако по някакъв начин се нуждаем то да ни одобри, да ни валидизира, ако очакваме да получим нещо от него, а не да му дадем най-доброто, тогава можем да се поддадем на молбата му. И въпреки това си казваме, че сме безкористни и даваме, и обичаме детето си; но това е лъжа! Ходът на действие, мотивиран от безкористна родителска любов, е да правим това, което е най-добро за детето, а не непременно това, което то иска, дори и да се разстрои.

Този принцип се прилага във всички човешки взаимоотношения. Ако вашият съпруг има проблеми с алкохола и ви моли да му купите бира, какъв ще е любящият отговор? Заради любовта бихте казали: “Обичам те и понеже те наистина те обичам, не желая да подпомагам твоето самоунищожение. Ще направя всичко по силите си за твоето добро, за твоето здраве и благополучие, но не мога и няма да ти помогна да се самоунищожаваш”.

Представете си тийнейджърка на първата си среща, с младеж, който още тогава се опитва да наруши нейната добродетел. Може дори да й каже: “Ако ме обичаше наистина, щеше да…”. Очевидно, всички признаваме, че правилният избор е да каже “не”. Но защо това е правилният избор? Често отговорът е: “Защото се нарушава Божията заповед”; “Защото да се отдадеш при тези обстоятелства е греховно”,”Защото това би омърсило тялото, което е храм на Светия Дух”. Макар че всички тези отговори са верни, ако приложим закона на любовта, какъв отговор бихме дали? Какво е наистина е най-доброто за младия човек? В най-добрия духовен интерес ли е за него момичето да веднага да каже “да” на желанията му? И не само че е правилно заради Бог да му каже “не”, не само че е правилно да поддържа собствената си добродетел, но и ако тя обича младежа, ако е загрижена за неговата вечна съдба, отговорът е: “Не, прекалено много ме е грижа за теб, за характера ти, за ума ти, за духовното ти развитие, за вечната ти съдба, а такъв акт би ти навредил, затова не мога да се съглася”.

Следователно, когато обичаме другите така, както Бог ги обича, ние не даваме просто това, което те искат, а използваме  дадения ни от Бога и осветен от Светия Дух разум, да изберем да използваме енергията и ресурсите си за тяхно благословение, да ги издигнем, да им помогнем да израстват, да им помогнем да преживеят пълното изцеление на сърцето, ума и характера, за да бъдат като Исус. И често това ще означава, че с обич ще трябва да казваме “не”.

 

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I’m a youth leader in South Africa. We as a youth group are currently using a lot of the material on the Come and Reason site. Since we’ve started using the material, our youth group has grown.

R. V. N., South Africa

 

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Thank you for the ministry you are sharing with us, it is a real blessing to us and especially to my husband and myself! You are encouraging us to think for ourselves and not just to except everything, without thinking it through, with God’s word!

M.K., USA

 

Testimony 21

I am absolutly on fire with the message at Come and Reason! I can’t get enough! I’ve read your book, blog, and articles. I’ve listened to your Bible study podcasts, your radio show, and your series – all excellent! It wasn’t until the past couple of years that I have I like I’m becoming “healthy,” with more to share with others than just beasts and commandments! I used to be a Bible worker and preached when the pastors were gone until I had had enough. I didnt realize at the time what the problem was, but i know now… the message wasn’t properly focused. Now my flame is rekindled. All of your little examples are so perfect in explaining something “complicated” and making it easily understood! Now I’m trying to shape it into a life changing evangelistic series! Thank you!

M.T., USA

 

Testimony 3

My husband is a pastor and I listen to your lesson almost every week. Thank you for helping me in my study life and to help me love the “real” God more.

C. F., NC, USA

 

Testimony 14

We really appreciate your views on the judgment and they make good sense considering our free choice.

Anonymous

 

Testimony 2

I continue to enjoy your lessons every week. The more that I research your conclusions, the more I am convinced that the Holy Spirit has lead you to distill out the essence of human redemption. Thank you for your courageous stand for the truth.

S. G., TX, USA

 

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I grew up in a prominent protestant church and had what I like to call religious anxiety. I’ve always had questions about God and Salvation that no one could seem to answer.  I didn’t know how to find resolution. During 2020, at the height of my anxiety, I fell to my knees and begged God to show me truth and light and to give me the hope that I’ve been longing for. Days later, I stumbled upon your online videos and it was like a veil was lifted and EVERYTHING made sense! For the first time in my almost 39 years of life, my religious/spiritual anxiety has lessened. I feel a sense of freedom and peace I’ve NEVER had before… and it’s all because my view of God has changed. Thank you!

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Testimony 44

We were given a gift of the DVD set, “God and Your Brain,” and we just finished watching it. The truths in this are so powerful and truly an answer to a prayer. We’re seeing hope where once we thought God wasn’t answering our prayers to be free of certain mindsets. He answered with these DVDs and we are hungry for more. Thank you!

Daniel T., Easley, SC, USA

 

Testimony 48

I just want to tell you how blessed I have been reading “The Remedy!” It has become a daily part of my devotional relationship with God. In it I have found a God of love and a God that loves me! The bible has come alive for me! It is the first time that I can say that I have felt hope fill my heart as I have read God’s word. This is good news I can share! Thank you, Dr Jennings! Thank you for your heart for others. I can’t put into words how this has set me free! It has strengthened my trust and love for God.

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Testimony 35

I am so pleased with the response your message is receiving at my church from the middle-aged to the young adults. I have given out 100 copies of the first two seminars and there are more request every week. One of my [class members] came to me after viewing the series, grateful and impressed with how easy the message was retained. He had been a Seventh-day Adventist in fear all his life, and felt like the scales were removed from his eyes after viewing the seminars. I am so impressed by the change I see in members who have received this message, we are in one accord. However, I am sadden by the negative response of the older people. I am verbally attacked anytime I talk about imposed laws, but I believe my mission is to enlightened everyone I can. I watch your Bible Study Class on YouTube every Friday night and I feel like I am apart of the class. All of you are in one accord and I am so blessed to have found you. I pray that all of you continue to spread this message and I am committed to doing my part.

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Testimony 25

I just want to say thank you so much for your conversations via YouTube. I regularly tune in to your lectures, “Let’s Talk” sessions, and many others. Through these I’ve found greater depth and meaning to God’s word. Thanks for all that you do and please continue. I’m currently working in the middle of Silicon Valley at Stanford University. I feel like God really has me in the right place right now and I’m sensing that your teachings might be part of it.

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Testimony 13

I borrowed “Healing The Mind” DVDs from a friend and showed them at my home for a small gathering of women friends. Neither of my friends are Adventist, but they both enjoyed and embraced the messages you taught. In fact, one of the ladies prayed out loud in our group and that was the first time she had ever had public prayer.

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Testimony 72

I am blown away by the truth that you present. God’s Design Law makes so much sense! You have validated my impression that, if God is love, He would not kill those who don’t want to know him. If God gives us choice, then how can He destroy us if our choice is not to follow him. Thank you for opening my eyes and heart to the pure love of God seen through Jesus. The love I now have for Jesus is deeper and free from condemnation. My heart has been opened to love others as Jesus loves me. May God continue to bless your God-given insight into His word and your ministry. The truth has set me free!

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Testimony 62

I would like to express my thanks to the C&R team for creating a platform from which people can learn to trust in God and grow. My life is a witness to the effectiveness of this ministry. Without believing the truth about God as you have shown, I don’t know what my life would be like. I had given up on God helping me with certain sins – it was all useless. Given that the scripture is clear and God is so good, how could I have betrayed him so many times? I was a yo-yo christian; spinning up and down. My faith and enthusiasm was driven by discoveries/threats that prophecy is about to be fulfilled. But when I watched your “Healing the Mind” seminar, it was like a light finally went on. I could see God had no plan to hurt me, the danger came from sin, and that He is working to protect me and strengthen me. Thank you for allowing God to use you. The message God gave C&R saved my life!

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Testimony 71

When I was 9 years old, I remember setting at our devotional table with a hunger and thirst for God that wanted more, deeper, BETTER. I can remember literally crying and pounding on the table, “I know these teachers didn’t mean to give us error. They taught what THEY had been TAUGHT, but didn’t ANYBODY READ THE BOOK?!?!?” It mattered to me then. It mattered to me as a teenager. It matters now as I teach bible classes. It didn’t have to be so hard as I watched so many give up and lay God’s great plan and gift of salvation aside as being “impossible.” Then, a friend sent me a link to Come And Reason’s website. I grew excited. YES! FINALLY! Then another friend told me to stay away, saying her son had just broken up with a girl because she was involved with Come And Reason and that “Tim Jennings preaches a false gospel.” But, AFTER many years of developing an authentic and, dare I say FUN relationship with Jesus, through the Holy Spirit I see this message has been around a LONG time, since the apostle Paul, Ellen White, Graham Maxwell, Ray Foucher, and yourself (though I admit, you’ve made me back up, rewind and replay the clips, and get out my well-worn Bible on a few things.) I’m so thankful I have found LIGHT during these DARK days. I am not alone.

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