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Does God Choose Our Life Partner?

Does God Choose Our Life Partner?

Is it true that God has created one person for each of us? what if i miss out on him and marry someone else, what happens then?

how do I know that such and such person if the right one for me? I know that we should bring these matters to God in prayer, but how does He answer? Many at times I’ve found that guys like to marry ladies who look very good. They should have everything perfect. Not everyone is perfect, so does that mean some will not be able to ever marry? Does God decide who should and shouldn’t get married?


Second only to our decision to surrender our lives to God, is our decision of life partner. As I travel I find people of all ages struggling with the very questions you have asked, so thank you for sending them.

God has designed human beings for relationship. In Eden God looked upon Adam and said it was not good for Adam to be alone and God created a partner specifically for Adam. Eve was created as Adam’s helper to help Adam enter into greater depths of Godlike love by providing someone for Adam to serve. Eve was Adam’s “second self” a being of equal worth, value, intelligence, and to whom Adam was to pour himself upon in humble love and service. Eve was to receive Adam’s love and respond with equal love, service and giving of herself to uplift Adam. Thus God’s design for mankind was the perfect intercourse of other-centered love revealing the love of the Godhead.

God’s creation of Eve is the only inspired recording we have of God specifically creating a marriage partner for someone. This means that God does not create “one” specific person for every one of us. While God’s design for marriage has not changed, mankind has been changed by sin. Our hearts are not perfect and we suffer from many defects that sin has brought upon the race. This means we must be careful in our selection of a life partner.

Not all persons are well suited to spend their lives together, even if both are genuinely surrendered to God. Therefore, some persons will find greater joy, peace, contentment and usefulness in God’s cause as single persons. This is no sin, but a wise choice exercised by those who know themselves well.  Others however, function better with a healthy marriage relationship, and finding a compatible partner is critical.

Because God has not created “one” specific person for each of us we don’t need to worry about “missing out” on that “one special person.” In this world there are many individuals with whom we can form a long term, loving, healthy and compatible relationship. So, don’t live in fear of “missing” the “only one.”

Healthy relationships require healthy people. Therefore, the first step in pursuing a marriage partner is to ensure you are the most spiritually mature person you can be. Instead of praying, “God help me find the person you would have be my spouse,” pray, “God, help me become the person you would have me be, capable of loving my spouse as you have loved me.” Once you have honestly dealt with step one, then you are ready to move on to step two.

How to tell who is “right” to marry? Another way to say it, how can I know if a particular person is well suited to be my life partner? By examining the evidence of their qualifications to be your life partner. And this is the purpose of dating. Dating is not for the purpose of getting someone to like you. Dating is for the purpose of evaluating whether the other person is qualified to be your life partner.

Jesus said, “The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45).

What this means is that each of us reveal in our actions and deeds the true nature of our hearts. Therefore, the wise person in the dating process does not date based on how the other person makes them feel, but with their good judgment involved evaluating the quality of character revealed and the general compatibility of interests, values and future goals.

If you were in charge of hiring for your company, upon what would you base your hiring decisions? Would it not be on the qualifications of the applicants?

What is more important to your life, employees at your firm or your life partner? Upon what factors are you deciding who will be your life partner? Have you determined the qualifications necessary for someone to be your life partner? If not you are not ready to date or pursue marriage.

Step two is stepping back and making a list of qualifications a person MUST possess in order to be qualified as your life partner. This list is only composed of non-negotiable elements, items that you could not live without. For instance, in order to be qualified as your life partner a person must genuinely like you for who you are. If they don’t like you for who you are, but are trying to change you, then they are not qualified. Another qualification is that the person we marry MUST be attractive to us. No one will be happy in a marriage with someone they don’t find attractive, but physical attraction alone is not enough to qualify someone for life partnership.

So, prayerfully prepare yourself to be the healthiest person you can be to love your future spouse, then make a list of qualifications a person must possess in order to be your life partner. Finally, with this list in mind begin the dating process, observe the person you are dating, allow them to reveal their true self over time, prayerfully reflect upon the evidence they reveal, gather input from the observations of trusted family and friends and then you, not God, must choose who you will marry.

In the process always keep your heart humble before God, asking Him to enlighten your mind to see the evidence and true qualities of the person you are dating, and then choose to act based upon those facts.

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Testimony 31

It was very touching to hear the testimony of your class share how viewing God’s true character has changed their lives. My feelings are the same – there is so much freedom in knowing that God LOVES me – regardless of my… just, REGARDLESS! I’m still blown away by the true gospel, the fact that God is not ready to strike us when we fail. He is not arbitrary. He simply loves us and warns of the natural consequences because He can’t stand to see us suffer. I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS GOD!!!

Ceil V.,  UT, USA

 

Testimony 57

You have helped make sense of thirty two years of confusion. The material you freely provide reorganized so much of my life into such a beautiful pattern that has always been hinted at from within, but misguided with my training and what I was experiencing externally. My filipno parents, who were converted from Catholicism to SDA, were sincere and did their best to raise me the right way and I have deep respect for them. However, being immigrants and not understanding the language made for a difficult transition as I was growing up, which also applied to my spiritual growth as I learned the patterns of religion. I have been listening to as many bible study classes and reading blog posts as my time in a work truck will allow, searching for the practical applications of where spirituality and reality meet, and I thank you for helping me find that. You have helped me reach a point in which I can truly say that I love God, that I believe He loves me, and, like David, I delight in His law. God bless.

Emmanuel V., Calgary, AB Canada

Testimony 43

Two years ago I stumbled upon your book, “Could It Be This Simple,” and then found “The God-Shaped Brain” videos on YouTube, your bible study class, and the ‘Come And Reason’ mobile app. I shared your book with a friend and after nine months of showing love, patience, and kindness this person has been changed by the love of God, too. The same love that healed me, I now express to other women in tangible ways, such as to a Baptist woman with high anxiety and childhood trauma. She was extremely happy and relieved when I shared about the so-called “judgment of God” and burning in hell. She had no desire to serve a God that was so harsh. I have repeated the phrase dozens of times to her. “What we believe has power over us, but we have power over what we believe…”

This message that you are sharing has changed my life. I will continue to serve other women and bring this message of God’s healing love to their lives by sharing your books, YouTube videos, and The Remedy Bible app. Keep up the good work. Don’t be discouraged. God is doing a mighty work in and through this ministry!

Jill L., Midwest, USA

 

Testimony 13

I borrowed “Healing The Mind” DVDs from a friend and showed them at my home for a small gathering of women friends. Neither of my friends are Adventist, but they both enjoyed and embraced the messages you taught. In fact, one of the ladies prayed out loud in our group and that was the first time she had ever had public prayer.

J.B. ,Dalles, OR, USA

 

Testimony 29

Thank you for all of your work to correct misconceptions about God’s character. So many people that my husband and I have talked to seem to be against the natural law construct and view it as “errant” and “dangerous.” Having learned more about it through your blogs and lessons, I don’t really understand why they view it that way, except that it means they have to relearn theology they have known for their entire lives. But I’m so excited to relearn this. For the past few years I have been questioning how I could trust a God who punishes arbitrarily and is full of wrath for those who don’t obey His commands. That view made me afraid to “mess up” or “not be good enough,” even within my relationship with God. I really appreciated the point you bring out about God not wanting us to serve Him because we are afraid, but because we love Him.

Melissa H., IN, USA

 

Testimony 76

Warm greetings from Tanzania! I just wanted to take a moment to thank you and your team at Come And Reason Ministries for the amazing work you do. Your teachings have opened my eyes to deep biblical truths and how to live them out in real life. I started following the ministry back in 2018, and ever since, my walk with God has grown so much stronger. I’ve found freedom from fear-based faith and now live with more peace and trust in Him. I’ve also been sharing what I’ve learned, especially through Bible School discussions. Your lessons are so insightful and well-explained that I try not to miss a single one. May God continue to bless the work you’re doing.
Elisha M., Tanzania, Africa

Testimony 38

Since November 2015, when I started studying Gods word from this God Is Love point of view, my life has been transformed. My troubled marriage of 15 years has been healed and my husband and I are truly happy for the first time in 15 years. Now When I read the word of God I understand it so much better and I can’t help but see Gods love radiating through the pages to humanity. Gods word is living and active and I am blessed beyond measure to be having this amazing experience. God has given me a beautiful understanding of Jn 3:16 that amazes me more and more each day. Thank you again for your ministry.

Helen D., London, England

 

Testimony 66

I am incredibly grateful for the transformative impact you’ve had on my life, and words cannot fully express my appreciation. Over the years, I have been an avid listener and follower of C&R and extend my heartfelt thanks for creating the C&R mobile app. It has allowed me to immerse myself in your lessons repeatedly, enabling me to grasp the profound significance about the Character of God, Design Law, the protocols for life, the reasons behind the current chaos, and Christ’s mission to restore everything. They have deeply touched me. Having studied with various churches, I came away with the perception that God is no different from the deities of ancient Greek or Roman mythology—demanding sacrifices and taking pleasure in bloodshed. Thanks to your transformative teachings, I have experienced a profound awakening to the true nature of God and the immense power of His love. It is truly a remarkable and liberating sensation to finally grasp the truth and embrace the empowering nature of God’s laws. My self-perception has become brighter and more infused with love. My journey of growth continues on a daily basis.

Chris P., Lake Mary, FL, USA

 

Testimony 35

I am so pleased with the response your message is receiving at my church from the middle-aged to the young adults. I have given out 100 copies of the first two seminars and there are more request every week. One of my [class members] came to me after viewing the series, grateful and impressed with how easy the message was retained. He had been a Seventh-day Adventist in fear all his life, and felt like the scales were removed from his eyes after viewing the seminars. I am so impressed by the change I see in members who have received this message, we are in one accord. However, I am sadden by the negative response of the older people. I am verbally attacked anytime I talk about imposed laws, but I believe my mission is to enlightened everyone I can. I watch your Bible Study Class on YouTube every Friday night and I feel like I am apart of the class. All of you are in one accord and I am so blessed to have found you. I pray that all of you continue to spread this message and I am committed to doing my part.

Clara S., Westfield, MA, USA

 

Testimony 73

I have been truly blessed by your blogs and other resources. They have helped me to see things in a much brighter light and to reason things out better. Thank you so much for your ministry. Whenever I have the opportunity I pass along your material to my friends.

R. Noseworthy, Newfoundland, Canada

Testimony 27

Your teachings about our heavenly Father have changed my life. Thank you sooooooo very very much! I know He’s doing some serious healing in my heart and life and I look forward to each new day to learn something new about Him and to just hear you speak about Him. Thank you, forever.

Nancy S.

 

Testimony 45

I have been confused for years about what [christianity] calls [its] most disgusting teaching. It has never made much sense to me and for that reason has been evermore empty. I have listened to your class off and on and have struggled determining what is truth, because of the resistance design law encounters in the church. So, I thank God for your ministry. What you teach makes sense. It’s logical and backed up by the power of love. I have never seen that in Christ until now. I am astounded by the insight that is found when we look at God’s ministry through design law. All strength to this message, as I believe it to be the power of God.

Brendon S.

 

Testimony 32

The message [of Come And Reason Ministries is] for all Christians (and those who may become Christians) and not just Adventists or any other group. It is difficult to imagine why any [anyone] with intellectual and spiritual honesty could find fault with the way you explained the healing substitution concepts and the truth about God’s character, though I know some will reject and criticize. On behalf of those in our group near Tacoma, WA, thank you and your staff for all of the hard work and for sharing the Gospel in this manner. God’s message of healing love will be carried to the whole world and then Jesus will come – He promised it.

Terry U., Tacoma, WA, USA

 

Testimony 53

I was so blessed by a friend who gave me your book, “The God Shaped Brain,” while I was sitting in church asking God to please help me learn more about Him and help me not to be so confused and scared. That was about 2 years ago. Your books have helped me to love God even more. I’m not confused or scared anymore! I have listened to all of your bible study classes and feel like I know the wonderful people that attend every week. Thank you for all that you’re doing in spreading the true message about God and His law of love. God bless you and your whole class.

Elssy P., Modesto, CA, USA

 

Testimony 58

I have been watching your videos in The Power of Love seminar and I must say these have liberated me and have improved my relationship with the Lord. I am no longer terrified of him as I was before following your teachings.

Thando N., South Africa