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Does God Choose Our Life Partner?

Does God Choose Our Life Partner?

Is it true that God has created one person for each of us? what if i miss out on him and marry someone else, what happens then?

how do I know that such and such person if the right one for me? I know that we should bring these matters to God in prayer, but how does He answer? Many at times I’ve found that guys like to marry ladies who look very good. They should have everything perfect. Not everyone is perfect, so does that mean some will not be able to ever marry? Does God decide who should and shouldn’t get married?


Second only to our decision to surrender our lives to God, is our decision of life partner. As I travel I find people of all ages struggling with the very questions you have asked, so thank you for sending them.

God has designed human beings for relationship. In Eden God looked upon Adam and said it was not good for Adam to be alone and God created a partner specifically for Adam. Eve was created as Adam’s helper to help Adam enter into greater depths of Godlike love by providing someone for Adam to serve. Eve was Adam’s “second self” a being of equal worth, value, intelligence, and to whom Adam was to pour himself upon in humble love and service. Eve was to receive Adam’s love and respond with equal love, service and giving of herself to uplift Adam. Thus God’s design for mankind was the perfect intercourse of other-centered love revealing the love of the Godhead.

God’s creation of Eve is the only inspired recording we have of God specifically creating a marriage partner for someone. This means that God does not create “one” specific person for every one of us. While God’s design for marriage has not changed, mankind has been changed by sin. Our hearts are not perfect and we suffer from many defects that sin has brought upon the race. This means we must be careful in our selection of a life partner.

Not all persons are well suited to spend their lives together, even if both are genuinely surrendered to God. Therefore, some persons will find greater joy, peace, contentment and usefulness in God’s cause as single persons. This is no sin, but a wise choice exercised by those who know themselves well.  Others however, function better with a healthy marriage relationship, and finding a compatible partner is critical.

Because God has not created “one” specific person for each of us we don’t need to worry about “missing out” on that “one special person.” In this world there are many individuals with whom we can form a long term, loving, healthy and compatible relationship. So, don’t live in fear of “missing” the “only one.”

Healthy relationships require healthy people. Therefore, the first step in pursuing a marriage partner is to ensure you are the most spiritually mature person you can be. Instead of praying, “God help me find the person you would have be my spouse,” pray, “God, help me become the person you would have me be, capable of loving my spouse as you have loved me.” Once you have honestly dealt with step one, then you are ready to move on to step two.

How to tell who is “right” to marry? Another way to say it, how can I know if a particular person is well suited to be my life partner? By examining the evidence of their qualifications to be your life partner. And this is the purpose of dating. Dating is not for the purpose of getting someone to like you. Dating is for the purpose of evaluating whether the other person is qualified to be your life partner.

Jesus said, “The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45).

What this means is that each of us reveal in our actions and deeds the true nature of our hearts. Therefore, the wise person in the dating process does not date based on how the other person makes them feel, but with their good judgment involved evaluating the quality of character revealed and the general compatibility of interests, values and future goals.

If you were in charge of hiring for your company, upon what would you base your hiring decisions? Would it not be on the qualifications of the applicants?

What is more important to your life, employees at your firm or your life partner? Upon what factors are you deciding who will be your life partner? Have you determined the qualifications necessary for someone to be your life partner? If not you are not ready to date or pursue marriage.

Step two is stepping back and making a list of qualifications a person MUST possess in order to be qualified as your life partner. This list is only composed of non-negotiable elements, items that you could not live without. For instance, in order to be qualified as your life partner a person must genuinely like you for who you are. If they don’t like you for who you are, but are trying to change you, then they are not qualified. Another qualification is that the person we marry MUST be attractive to us. No one will be happy in a marriage with someone they don’t find attractive, but physical attraction alone is not enough to qualify someone for life partnership.

So, prayerfully prepare yourself to be the healthiest person you can be to love your future spouse, then make a list of qualifications a person must possess in order to be your life partner. Finally, with this list in mind begin the dating process, observe the person you are dating, allow them to reveal their true self over time, prayerfully reflect upon the evidence they reveal, gather input from the observations of trusted family and friends and then you, not God, must choose who you will marry.

In the process always keep your heart humble before God, asking Him to enlighten your mind to see the evidence and true qualities of the person you are dating, and then choose to act based upon those facts.

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Just watched watched lesson 10 in the 1st quarter 2021 bible study classs on Isaiah. I want to thank you for your intellectual spirituality; it’s not an oxymoron! From the point of view of a teacher I also enjoy seeing how much personal pleasure you clearly take in not just tasting, but feasting on God’s word – it reminds me of Jeremiah not being able to hold it in! It makes me smile that your cup is so full and overflowing that you make it to Tuesday’s lesson (on a good day). It just goes to show the richness of God’s Word.

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I am absolutly on fire with the message at Come and Reason! I can’t get enough! I’ve read your book, blog, and articles. I’ve listened to your Bible study podcasts, your radio show, and your series – all excellent! It wasn’t until the past couple of years that I have I like I’m becoming “healthy,” with more to share with others than just beasts and commandments! I used to be a Bible worker and preached when the pastors were gone until I had had enough. I didnt realize at the time what the problem was, but i know now… the message wasn’t properly focused. Now my flame is rekindled. All of your little examples are so perfect in explaining something “complicated” and making it easily understood! Now I’m trying to shape it into a life changing evangelistic series! Thank you!

M.T., USA

 

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I am just writing to say that I have been so blessed by the teachings of Come And Reason Minitries recently. I watched last week’s bible study lesson on Youtube and am thankful that the error in the printed lesson guide you use was pointed out and this week’s study was of equal benefit, if not more so. My understanding of God’s nature has been very confused of late and I am so grateful for clarity in this matter. I have never really fully understood previously how a good God can cause bad things to happen and now I realise that He doesn’t, it’s a natural consequence of sin. May the almighty Father and His Son, our Saviour Jesus Christ, continue to bless your ministry.

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Thank you! I love listening to the Come And Reason Ministries Bible study classes and am using some of your notes to get the lessons together that I will be teaching. You always have such good quotes and Bible texts and pull things together to make good sense.

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Ceil V.,  UT, USA

 

Testimony 65

I have been tuning into your weekly study classes for a while now and wanted express my appreciation for the teachings that ha been a huge blessing in opening up the true message of the word. Viewing scripture under an imposed law theory always, without fail, raised more questions, concerns, and conflicting scripture interpretations that were discouraging at the very least. Looking at scripture through the design law lens has brought more truth to light for me personally and an understanding of our Heavenly Father that places Him “above all others,” where I am now more than thrilled to witness and serve Him.  I “stumbled” across this ministry a year or so ago and would only watch a few minutes at a time. But the more I listened and the longer I paid attention, the more my spiritual eyes were opened to the ever present truths of scripture. The comprehension of the great controversy and it’s origin by the lies perpetrated and perpetuated throughout the Bible on the attack of God’s character and government is truly priceless. Keep up the Good Work! Your servanthood is desperately needed in such a time as this!

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Thank you and may God continue to bless you as you share with others the intricacies of how we are all “fearfully and wonderfully made”. I must share that you have opened a whole new world to me, and I have found tremendous healing through what you have shared in two of your books, “Could It Be This Simple?” and “The God Shaped Brain.” I praise God for what you shared, what I have learned, and how I have grown and healed! My prayer is that My Precious Jesus will be seen by others in the way I live, act, talk, etc. and they may be encouraged to know He is truly a GREAT God of LOVE, desiring that no one should perish! God Bless you in your continued endeavors to present Him as He really is!

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Testimony 48

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Testimony 66

I am incredibly grateful for the transformative impact you’ve had on my life, and words cannot fully express my appreciation. Over the years, I have been an avid listener and follower of C&R and extend my heartfelt thanks for creating the C&R mobile app. It has allowed me to immerse myself in your lessons repeatedly, enabling me to grasp the profound significance about the Character of God, Design Law, the protocols for life, the reasons behind the current chaos, and Christ’s mission to restore everything. They have deeply touched me. Having studied with various churches, I came away with the perception that God is no different from the deities of ancient Greek or Roman mythology—demanding sacrifices and taking pleasure in bloodshed. Thanks to your transformative teachings, I have experienced a profound awakening to the true nature of God and the immense power of His love. It is truly a remarkable and liberating sensation to finally grasp the truth and embrace the empowering nature of God’s laws. My self-perception has become brighter and more infused with love. My journey of growth continues on a daily basis.

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Testimony 57

You have helped make sense of thirty two years of confusion. The material you freely provide reorganized so much of my life into such a beautiful pattern that has always been hinted at from within, but misguided with my training and what I was experiencing externally. My filipno parents, who were converted from Catholicism to SDA, were sincere and did their best to raise me the right way and I have deep respect for them. However, being immigrants and not understanding the language made for a difficult transition as I was growing up, which also applied to my spiritual growth as I learned the patterns of religion. I have been listening to as many bible study classes and reading blog posts as my time in a work truck will allow, searching for the practical applications of where spirituality and reality meet, and I thank you for helping me find that. You have helped me reach a point in which I can truly say that I love God, that I believe He loves me, and, like David, I delight in His law. God bless.

Emmanuel V., Calgary, AB Canada