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Confessing Faults and Sins

Confessing Faults and Sins

You presented a really moving and challenging set of seminars at Midport SDA. I had a couple of questions that arose out of your first presentation on Guilt. Unfortunately, we ran out of time and you could not take any more questions. I would really appreciate it if you could respond here.


I got this quote from your website, and it relates to my questions, but I’m trying to wrap my mind around it: “The only solution to legitimate guilt is repentance and restoration. This includes more than simple confession. It includes an internal change of heart desire where one no longer even wants to do such behavior again, and restoration only when such reparation would add no further harm.”

My questions are

  1. When is it inappropriate to confess guilt to humans? (For instance, I have seen where spouses admitted to having affairs, and this only complicated the situation, resulting in more hurt, anger, and divorce. Some clinicians recommend confessing while others don’t.)
  2. What is the difference between confessing “faults” and “sins” to humans?

Thank you for your time. And yes, my understanding of God’s character has been strengthened. I want to be reunited once more with the One who loves me beyond all others.


After Adam and Eve sinned they ran and hid because they were “afraid.” Fear is part of the infection of sin. We are all born defective, wired with insecurity, fear, doubt, as well as physical and genetic defects. Because of this we all have various faults and sins. These lead us to “fear” no one could ever love us if they “really” knew us. We create walls and masks to hide behind, which only increases our fear of being discovered and found out for who we really are in heart, thus increasing the fear and intensity in which we try to hide our true selves from others. This is a vicious reinforcing cycle. Think of how comfortable you would be discussing your addiction with most of your church members. Would you not fear their shock and disappointment rather than expect their love and support.

Confessing faults to one another is part of the healing process of acknowledging our brokenness, weakness, need for a savior, and then experiencing the loving acceptance of others. It is the process honestly acknowledging your faults and then experience genuine love and acceptance that healing occurs. This is one of the key elements in 12 step recovery groups. Fear of rejection is reduced and we are able to love others in a healthier way and in so doing fear is reduced and we are healed in the process. This is part of God’s plan to break down walls of prejudice and bias as we come back into the unity of love in the knowledge of God. Faults include our sinful nature, fears, inabilities, mistakes, habits, regrets and sometimes specific sins are included. But not all specific sin is included – some specific sin is between the individual and God.

There are generally three types of sin – public, individual to individual, and private. Public sin requires public confession in addition to repentance of heart, which is a gift from God, and restoration if possible. Sin against an individual requires we go to the individual and confess/repent, ask forgiveness and restore as far as possible what was taken. Private sin, which is not only sin within the heart, but also sin which has remained private from the one offended, requires confession to God, repentance but not necessarily making such sin public or confessing to another person, even if the another was wronged. It should also include restoring anything taken, if possible, if it can be done without adding harm or injuring.

The example you gave is a perfect illustration of this. A man/woman cheats on their spouse, after the event there is conviction of wrong, with subsequent confession to God, repentance of heart, and perhaps asking the person they cheated with to forgive them. Then years pass with ongoing loyalty and faithfulness to their spouse. What would happen to the innocent spouse if this sin were subsequently confessed to them? It would injure the innocent spouse. The spouse who was wronged, but doesn’t know it, when they find out will have anger, fear, insecurity, doubt, and will have to struggle with resentment and forgiveness issues. A seed of bitterness and hurt will be planted into the heart of the innocent spouse by the confession of the guilty spouse. This does no good and causes positive further injury, risking not only the integrity of the marriage, but the spiritual health of the innocent spouse and perhaps injuring their children and other family members.

Therefore, IF, and I emphasize IF, the sin is historic, the heart of the sinner is repentant and changed through God’s grace so that the cheat is no longer a cheat, then the confession to the unaware injured party would do harm and therefore, should not be done. However, IF the heart of the one who cheated has not changed and they remain a cheat then the innocent spouse needs to know so they can make love based decisions upon that information. Such decisions would include confronting the spouse who cheated, in love, seeking their repentance and restoration in grace, and if the spouse refuses to repent and become faithful then to leave the marriage lest by staying they endorse the unhealthy and destructive behavior of the cheating spouse.

Ultimately, though, the principle here is love – when we love others we seek to bless them and not cause injury. When we remain self-focused and adhere to a rule oriented belief system, then we feel compelled to “confess” such sin in order to “ensure” our “record” is clear in heaven and we can be saved, regardless of the injury to others. Such religion is selfishness disguised as righteousness and only spreads damage and doesn’t heal either the offender or offended.

When we put love first, we quickly realize that we cannot prescribe a cookie cutter behavior that fits every situation, but understand some situations will be best served by a confession, whereas others are best served by remaining silent, for we are interested not in self, but in loving others more than self.

One of the founders of my church put it this way:

The apostle says, “Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed.” James 5:16. Confess your sins to God, who only can forgive them, and your faults to one another. If you have given offense to your friend or neighbor, you are to acknowledge your wrong, and it is his duty freely to forgive you. Then you are to seek the forgiveness of God, because the brother you have wounded is the property of God, and in injuring him you have sinned against his Creator…

True confession is always of a specific character, and acknowledges particular sins. They may be of such a nature as to be brought before God only; they may be wrongs that should be confessed to individuals who have suffered injury through them; or they may be of a public character, and should then be as publicly confessed. But all confession should be definite and to the point, acknowledging the very sins of which you are guilty.

Many, many confessions should never be spoken in the hearing of mortals; for the result is that which the limited judgment of finite beings does not anticipate… God will be better glorified if we confess the secret, inbred corruption of the heart to Jesus alone than if we open its recesses to finite, erring man, who cannot judge righteously unless his heart is constantly imbued with the Spirit of God… Do not pour into human ears the story which God alone should hear. — Faith I Live By, pg. 128

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Thank you! I love listening to the Come And Reason Ministries Bible study classes and am using some of your notes to get the lessons together that I will be teaching. You always have such good quotes and Bible texts and pull things together to make good sense.

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I borrowed “Healing The Mind” DVDs from a friend and showed them at my home for a small gathering of women friends. Neither of my friends are Adventist, but they both enjoyed and embraced the messages you taught. In fact, one of the ladies prayed out loud in our group and that was the first time she had ever had public prayer.

J.B. ,Dalles, OR, USA

 

Testimony 75

Thank you so much for everything you do! Because of all these truths, I’m excited to be with Jesus! I always pray everyday, “COME TODAY, JESUS.” Before finding C&R, I was always praying for delays, “NOT TODAY OH GOD. I AM NOT READY.” I just need to share more, talk more bout this truth, so everybody will be excited for Jesus.

J C Shin

Testimony 6

I got the book “Could It Be This Simple?” a few months ago and the reading was wonderful and I was fascinated. I lent the book to a friend at work. She is having a difficult time and the book is helping her to find Jesus and I found this very exciting. She has asked me questions and I can see her life changing.

H. S., Australia

 

Testimony 49

I came into the church at 21, but that is as far as it went. I was so confused about what love is. I couldn’t find it in the bible, because I am not a person that can read between the lines. I have no logic. I have read many, many books; trying to figure out the crux of the matter. They were helpful, but something was still missing. I have become very frustrated to the point of crying out to God, “Where can I go?”  I needed some basics.

I found two books, written by Timothy Jennings, MD, to be very helpful. God showed me that I had lived my whole life in fear. I didn’t even see it. Now, I do. God is so good.  I discovered the “The Remedy”  Dr. Jennings new book, “The God-Shaped Heart!” Oh, I was so excited, I purchased them right away.

I can get rid of most of my books, because “The Remedy” brings the Love of God out so clearly, even I can’t miss it. Now, I want to sit and read my Bible. Wow, what a revelation! It is just simply Awesome! I am so grateful to Jehovah Almighty for hearing my prayer for more understanding! I am so encouraged!

Jackie S.

 

Testimony 52

Your unique way in spreading the truth is what we all need today. Most of us don’t recognize the contamination coming from all the lies and selfishness in the world. Because of our fear of death, we forgot how to live. Lies left and right. I was losing hope and faith, because of so many ideas that are always contradicting each other – so many questions answered by other, more complicated, questions – until I found your channel on YouTube.

You did not just give me answers, you also taught me how to answer new questions that arise in my mind. Now I see things differently. I see God’s mercy, grace, and Love everywhere, in spite of all the chaos that we all have done as humans. I don’t fear death anymore. Accepting the Truth and Love about God is truly a genuine Freedom from all the confusions, sufferings, selfishness, pain, and death.

I just wanted to say, thank you, sooooo much for revealing the real Remedy for our infected life. I have a new hope and now see the world in a different perspective!

Wheinny P., University Place, WA, USA

 

Testimony 70

I have been watching you for many years and have learned to love God with all my heart. I was raised by a loving Christian mother that had been lied to about who God really was, so our religious upbringing was hell fire and damnation. As soon as I was old enough and moved out, I not only left the church, I ran as fast as I could to get away from it. Sad to say, it wasn’t until the past couple of years that I learned and understand who my Father really is and how much He loves me. I understand God’s Design Laws (which make sense) and when I’m teaching my church Bible study class, I’m able to really put to use the things I’ve been learning and Holy Spirit is leading. Thank you for introducing me to my Father of true, pure love. Everyday with Him is new and exciting. One thing that breaks my heart is that I didn’t know Him sooner. God Bless you and your ministry!

Judy Phelps, Reno, NV, USA

Testimony 42

I am just writing to say that I have been so blessed by the teachings of Come And Reason Minitries recently. I watched last week’s bible study lesson on Youtube and am thankful that the error in the printed lesson guide you use was pointed out and this week’s study was of equal benefit, if not more so. My understanding of God’s nature has been very confused of late and I am so grateful for clarity in this matter. I have never really fully understood previously how a good God can cause bad things to happen and now I realise that He doesn’t, it’s a natural consequence of sin. May the almighty Father and His Son, our Saviour Jesus Christ, continue to bless your ministry.

Laura P., United Kingdom

 

Testimony 37

Hearing Dr. Jennings’ presentations in person came at a pivotal moment in my spiritual journey that began about nine months ago, when the fault lines inherent in my belief system began to crack under questions that most reasonable people end up asking about God and His nature. These were questions I couldn’t find answers to, and they shook my faith. I was unable let it go any longer and be satisfied. My Christian experience became distant. I was afraid; the fear in me rose like thorns, pushing me away from Jesus. And then someone heard my questions and introduced me to this ministry, and my life has totally changed.

I can tell you that this new, “present truth” message is far grander and life-changing than when I shifted from being an agnostic and then a nominal Christian. It has radically altered my worldview, because it reveals a God that makes sense. It is a revolution. I believe that Dr. Jennings’ message is the final message that must go to the world. If any message could be called “righteousness by faith,” as abused as that term is by the right and the left, this is that message, because Jennings’ biblical message identifies a God who is different, whose character isn’t an impossible contradiction.

I walk this path now without fear. I see people differently, and the Holy Spirit burns in my heart. Many call Dr. Jennings’ message false and compromising, but it isn’t false, because I’ve seen the fruits within my mind and body. It is not compromising, because in this message is the only road to holiness that makes any sense. No longer do I behold a pagan god who is always angry and suspicious. Instead, I behold a God who is freeing and loving, always working for our good, and giving me every reason to love my enemy even to my own death, just as Jesus pleads with us. God is good.

Anthony L., CA, USA

 

Testimony 2

I continue to enjoy your lessons every week. The more that I research your conclusions, the more I am convinced that the Holy Spirit has lead you to distill out the essence of human redemption. Thank you for your courageous stand for the truth.

S. G., TX, USA

 

Testimony 47

I can’t even begin to thank you and your ministry enough for introducing me to the Truth about a loving and merciful God! I have my daughter and her in-laws to thank for sharing with me “The God-Shaped Brain” as well as your website. I listen to the Bible study class lessons on my daily walk. May God continue to bless your thirst-quenching ministry!

Liz H., Port Angeles, WA, USA

 

 

Testimony 7

Ok, so last night I listened to “The Law of Liberty” and “How to Achieve Victory: Freedom, Truth and Spirtual Warfare.” These are both MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITES so far! The logic is just soooooo beautiful. I had to re-listen to them a couple of times. I just want to EXPLODE! (<< we assume with joy and happiness)

N. B., Canada

 

Testimony 9

I really enjoy with you the view of a gracious God. Thank you for sharing the work you are allowing the Lord to do in you.

L., Queensland, Australia

 

Testimony 35

I am so pleased with the response your message is receiving at my church from the middle-aged to the young adults. I have given out 100 copies of the first two seminars and there are more request every week. One of my [class members] came to me after viewing the series, grateful and impressed with how easy the message was retained. He had been a Seventh-day Adventist in fear all his life, and felt like the scales were removed from his eyes after viewing the seminars. I am so impressed by the change I see in members who have received this message, we are in one accord. However, I am sadden by the negative response of the older people. I am verbally attacked anytime I talk about imposed laws, but I believe my mission is to enlightened everyone I can. I watch your Bible Study Class on YouTube every Friday night and I feel like I am apart of the class. All of you are in one accord and I am so blessed to have found you. I pray that all of you continue to spread this message and I am committed to doing my part.

Clara S., Westfield, MA, USA

 

Testimony 57

You have helped make sense of thirty two years of confusion. The material you freely provide reorganized so much of my life into such a beautiful pattern that has always been hinted at from within, but misguided with my training and what I was experiencing externally. My filipno parents, who were converted from Catholicism to SDA, were sincere and did their best to raise me the right way and I have deep respect for them. However, being immigrants and not understanding the language made for a difficult transition as I was growing up, which also applied to my spiritual growth as I learned the patterns of religion. I have been listening to as many bible study classes and reading blog posts as my time in a work truck will allow, searching for the practical applications of where spirituality and reality meet, and I thank you for helping me find that. You have helped me reach a point in which I can truly say that I love God, that I believe He loves me, and, like David, I delight in His law. God bless.

Emmanuel V., Calgary, AB Canada